Riding Out The Storm of Change
Recently my life was subject to some changes. I moved to a different country (400 km away from home) in search of new horizons, and started studying there. Little did I know, my horizons were right in front of me all this time.
The universities here are more prestigious than back home, and offer degrees in English. The country itself is richer, and more prosperous.
However, after studying for 3 months, I came to the realization that this was a mistake. I had put down many roots back home, and left them to dry out, and most importantly, I realized that I had lost sight of why I even initiated this change.
Never thought I’d miss home once moving here. I was proven completely wrong.
Another reason for my decision to move back home is that me sacrificing connections with my people back home wasn’t worth the supposed upgrade and prestige of the university and especially the degree that I chose.
It just isn’t worth staying here, and I don’t see myself wanting to finish this degree, or feeling any pride upon completion. There’s no drive.
So after spending 3 months acclimatizing to this new life, getting the local ID card, getting my place of residence registered, finally starting to learn my way around the city, making a few friends… I am once again initiating changes and moving back home, yet in a new way. With a new perspective. New values. And a changed mind.
I understand that I might be giving something up by quitting here, however I don’t feel I am giving up something that is valuable to me. I believe I can succeed just as much back home as I could by remaining here.
What even is success anyway, if not you being content with how you live your life?
The only difference between home and this prestigious land, is that this land has only objective prestige. However, back home, I had built up connections with people that I value more than any damn prestige in this world.
I do feel a bit silly. After all, I moved away, only to move back. But not by any means am I moving in circles. My life was subject to rapid changes, and so were my values, views on life, friends, family, and my very self.
Whenever you find yourself subject to rapid changes, don’t be afraid. Because the changes will make a change in you. A person changing, means a person progressing, and most importantly moving. Sometimes it’s many steps forward, or many steps back.
Sometimes the classic two forward one back. For me, it was one forward, one back. And I intend to take a step forward next. Don’t be afraid to find out what your next step shall be. Take it, and never be afraid of a misstep.
“Frightened of change? But what can exist without it? What’s closer to nature’s heart? Can you take a hot bath and leave the firewood as it was? Eat food without transforming it? Can any vital process take place without something being changed? Can’t you see? It’s just the same with you — and just as vital to nature.” — Marcus Aurelius, Meditations
